Fine dining in France is a unique and formal culinary experience that has its traditional rules and etiquette.
The rules can vary slightly, depending on the establishment and the region, but here are some general guidelines to keep in mind when you are dining at a formal restaurant in France.
Etiquette for fine dining
In English, ‘etiquette’ means the acceptable type of behaviour in a particular situation. It comes from the French word etiquette, which is a ticket or a label that’s attached to something to identify or describe it.
If you don’t want to be ‘labelled’, or stand out for the wrong reasons, you might like to follow these suggestions.
Make a reservation
When you want to eat at a fine dining restaurant, it is highly recommended, and usually essential, to make a reservation in advance. Walk-ins will generally not be accommodated, especially during busy periods. If you have your heart set on a particular restaurant, book several days, or a week, in advance.
Observe usual meal times
Booking a table for 8:00 or 8:30 pm is customary in more formal establishments, although many restaurants are open for dinner by 7:30 pm and are happy to serve you. Trying to make an earlier booking is really not the thing to do. It’s also quite common to book a table for much later in the evening. Most restaurants are open until midnight. There is more flexibility in bistrots and brasseries, which are for more casual dining.
Note the dress code
Always dress appropriately, according to the restaurant’s level of formality. Fine dining establishments usually expect elegant attire – for example, smart business to formal dress.
Avoid casual clothing or street wear. Definitely no shorts, t-shirts, trainers or flip-flops or you will feel very much out of place. On second thoughts, you probably wouldn’t get past the door.
On arrival
Make sure you arrive on time. Being punctual is a sign of respect for the restaurant and its staff.
When you enter the restaurant, it’s customary to greet the host or hostess with a polite Bonjour (if you are arriving for lunch) or Bonsoir (in the evening)
Wait to be seated. The host or hostess will escort you to your table.
At the table
Place the napkin on your lap as soon as you sit down. If you need to leave the table temporarily, during the meal, loosely fold the napkin and place it on your chair.
Study the menu thoroughly. You should know that, in French, what English speakers call a menu is la carte. When you order from the menu, therefore, you are ordering à la carte.
In French, un menu is a fixed set of courses. In bistrots, brasseries and some less formal restaurants, it’s usually two or three set courses with limited options, sometimes called un formule. So if you ask for le menu, that’s what you’ll get. In a fine dining restaurant you will almost certainly be given la carte before you need to ask for it.
Fine dining establishments, however, often offer a tasting menu (menu de dégustation) or a gourmet selection of the chef’s finest (menu gastronomique); the server will probably explain the options to you. These menus often consist of many small courses and tend to be expensive.
Wait for the server to come to take your order. Be polite and patient and don’t rush the process. If you have dietary preferences or allergies, it’s best to inform the server at this stage. Asking for other alterations to courses, though, is usually frowned upon, which is something you might find strange.
In France, wine is an integral part of the dining experience. The sommelier (wine specialist) or serveur (waiter) will help you select an appropriate wine to pair with your food, if you wish.
Observe formal table manners. This includes using utensils from the outside in, holding your knife and fork correctly and keeping your elbows off the table.
Bread is usually served in a basket or on a small plate. Tear off a small piece and add butter before eating. Don’t cut bread with a knife.
When you are having a conversation, keep your voice low and be polite and discreet. Avoid using your phone at the table.
Take your time to savour each course and enjoy the dining experience. Fine dining is about more than sustenance; the French consider it almost an art form.
After your meal
When you are ready to leave, your server will usually be alert and present the bill. If you need to ask for it, it’s customary to say ‘L’ addition, s’il vous plaît (The bill, please).
Perhaps you’ve seen films where people call out ‘Hey, garçon’; mais non! Don’t do it. It’s way, way out of date and now considered rude. Address the servers as ‘Monsieur’ or ‘Madame’. Never call out or snap your fingers to attract their attention. French servers are extremely observant and will always look out for your signal.
You can pay by cash or credit card, A service charge is included in the bill. Although it’s not expected, as it is in some countries, it’s becoming more common in France to leave an additional tip of 10-15% for exceptional service.
If you follow these guidelines, you’re more likely to have respectful and enjoyable fine dining experience in France. Levels of formality can vary, so if you aren’t sure, it’s always a good idea to gauge the atmosphere and follow the lead of the staff and other diners in the restaurant.
For more information on eating out in France, see these Francy That! articles:
